1. Dad's famous line....."Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."  ..... Lindsey Gibson

 

2. Somewhere in Texas there’s a village that is missing its idiot. ..... Anon

 

3. It’s your world, I’m just walking around in it.  ..... Gibson

 

4. The Creationists think that dinosaurs are “Jesus horses”. ..... Anon

 

5. If you don’t write it down, it doesn’t happen. ..... Anon

 

6. You can learn from every situation, what to do or what not to do. ..... Gibson

 

7. You can fix near sightedness with glasses.

    You can fix a hearing problem with a hearing aid.

    But you can not fix stupid. ..... Ron White

 

8. You can turn painful situations around through laughter.

    Even if you can find humor in anything –even poverty–you can survive it. ..... Bill Cosby

 

9. At least two thirds of our miseries spring from human stupidity, human malice and those great motivators

    and justifiers of malice and stupidity, idealism, dogmatism and proselytizing zeal on behalf of religious or political

    idols. .....  Aldous Huxley

10.  Lighthouses are more helpful than churches. ..... Benjamin Franklin

11. For two people in marriage to live together day after day is unquestionably the one miracle the Vatican has overlooked.  ..... Bill Cosby

12. To my friends who enjoy a glass of wine ... And those who don't. 


      
As Ben Franklin said: In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. 

 

       In a number of carefully controlled trials, scientists have demonstrated that if we drink 1 liter of water each day,

       at the end of the year we would have absorbed more than 1 kilo of Escherichia coli , (E. coli) - bacteria  found in feces.

     

       In other words, we are consuming 1 kilo of poop.

 

       However, we do NOT run that risk when drinking wine & beer (or tequila, rum, Whiskey or other liquor) because alcohol

       has to go through a purification process of boiling, filtering and/or fermenting. 

 

       Remember: Water = Poop, ..........Wine = Health

 

       Therefore, it's better to drink wine and talk stupid, than to drink water and be full of shit !

 

       There is no need to thank me for this valuable information: I'm doing it as a public service.